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Like I'm going to let one of these smelly old farts get his hands on me? Not bloody fucking likely, you can bet your sweet ass on that.I think it was Larry who was the last straw. I mean, the guy never wore underwear, you know? Fuck. Like I cared, but go into the kitchen in the morning and see this turkey with a t-shirt on and no pants scratching his balls while he makes coffee and see how much you like that. Crap. Not for me.I was out of there that afternoon, and getting myself royally fucked by Phil at Phil's Fine Furniture later that evening. He said I could sleep on his customer couch or anywhere I wanted to. There was just this one teeny tiny thing I needed to do for him first.So I took him in my mouth and jacked him and sucked him until he came all over my face, and that was just for starters. Shit, that guy was a slob. I knew there wasn't any future in this, I mean it, I really did, but it was warm and dry and a place to sleep, you know? So I took it.Even if I could barely. The town was making strides recovering, but it was slow going. The old bridges and buildings originally designed as monuments to big business needed some repairs.We had been visiting these friends most of the early afternoon and evening for dinner and drinks and at about 9 PM my wife was ready to go back to the hotel. She and our friend’s wife had been drinking some kind of homemade mojito concoction, and she was feeling it. We said our goodbyes, and said we’d stop back by tomorrow on our way back home. Their home was just outside of the town proper, so we were making our way back to the hotel in the town center. It was a Saturday night so the local hot spots, sports bars and such were active. We were on the main road just off the interstate approaching a red traffic light at an intersection when my wife started laughing loudly. I knew she was half drunk, maybe more, and we were in a pretty big intersection, so the traffic light was taking forever to cycle through.“What are you.
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